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Problem is with you, not others: Blaming yourself is better than blaming others!
A close friend of mine met me on April 5th,
2018 which is equivalent to 20th of Rajjab-ul-Asab, 1439.
Maybe he was tensed for some reason and because of
the connection I have with him, I figured. Out of curiosity coupled with
concern, I asked him, “What the matter was? What had taken over his charming
face?” (not so charming actually)
He
asked me in a mild tone “Do you know what it is?”
I replied being puzzled, “Thursday!!”
With a heavy voice, he said angrily, “not the day
you fool, what is special about today?”
Now, I was completely out of the game, I didn’t know
anything above the day though my memory was quite good but hardly anything came
to my mind and I was sure he was not asking for some historical event or
something alike. It had to be something related to him which made him so numb.
Out of curiosity, I asked him, “Is it your
birthday?”
In a reliving tone, he said, “At last you got it.”
I was not happy still I wished him first and then
just to check the credibility of my memory I asked him in fear “Isn’t your
Birthday on **th of November?”
He replied, “Yes” and added “Today is my birthday
according to the Hijri Calendar and I am angry because no one remembers it.”
I was happy now (my memory is good and kicking as
always!!)
Further, I got anxious and asked him, “How would
anyone know about it? You have never told us about the other date!”
He replied, in an angry tone, “So what? You all
should have known, at least my family should have!”
And now I got what had actually taken him down.
Still, I asked to confirm “haven’t
your family members wished you yet?”
In a rude tone, he replied, “No! They don’t care
about me” and added curtly, “No one does.”
Unfortunately, I couldn’t stop laughing.
And fortunately, he didn’t punch me in the face and
asked the reason for my laughter.
I tried explaining him about us first that “We
aren’t almighty to know your birthday unless you tell us yourself and if it was
to check whether someone cares about you or not, try telling them in advance
and I am sure they will remember if they care!” I further added, “I knew your
Birthday according to the Gregorian
calendar, didn’t I?”
He nodded his head and
said, “Yeah but my mom dad?”
I was speech bound for a
moment but I knew his family very well. I was astonished how come they do not
remember his birthday.
After thinking about it a
little I told him upfront, “Buddy the problem is not with them I can assure you,
look for yourself I am sure you are missing on something, you are being
ignorant about something.” Curiously I told him, “You might not be giving them
appropriate time, maybe they didn’t expect you at home so they might not have
prepared anything special as per your expectation”
After he heard what I had
to say, he seemed into the blue.
I was waiting for him to
say something and finally, after a minute or two, he opened his mouth.
He said, “Bro! Even I hadn’t
expected me to be at home.”
I was bamboozled and I
asked, “What??”
He explained to me that he
had other plans for today but as they got cancelled in the first place, it made
him think about his family not caring about him. Had it all gone according to
the plan he would not have thought about his family not preparing anything for
him”
Honestly, those words of
him got over my nerve and I couldn’t control addressing him as an A**hole!
I asked him, “Stop blaming
other for not caring about you and start thinking why should they care about
you in the first place? Do you care about them? Are you doing it the right way?
Are you giving them time? Are you giving them required space in your life?”
The event made me introspect and I had
to note it somewhere which made me write that note in the picture which I
believe is a great message to those who can understand it.
Author - Mohammed Vohra
Editor - Ibrahim Vaid
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Author - Mohammed Vohra
Editor - Ibrahim Vaid
Like Us on Facebook
